*This is a collaborative post.
During the time in your life when you become a parent, there is likely another change occurring with a different relationship in your life. We are talking about your role as a daughter to your parents. When you reach the point in life where you start to plan for kids, your parents will be reaching the point where they are starting to move towards retirement. While they won’t always need your assistance and support, it’s possible that they may experience changes to their level of independence. If that’s the case, they will lean on you more in a range of different aspects of their life.
This will ultimately mean that you are going to need to effectively manage your role as a parent and as a daughter at the same time.
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What Will Your Responsibilities Be As A Daughter With Elderly Parents?
Your responsibilities and role as a daughter when you have elderly parents will depend on the individual requirements that they have. For instance, it’s possible that they are experiencing mental health changes. If that’s the case, then you might be required to support them with day to day tasks. Or, if their mobility has been impacted, then you may need to help them reach different locations
You could decide to move your parents in with you. However, this is always going to lead to significant changes in your life. It will impact the rest of your family too. So, you do need to consider this before you move them in. Moving your parents into live with will also change their relationship with you as well. Your role has a carer and in some cases the owner of the house becomes more prominent than your role as a daughter. It can also mean that it takes attention away that you should be spending on your kids.
Helping Your Parents With Their Independence
Instead of taking on the role of a carer for your parents while managing your role as a mother yourself, you should think about helping your parents further develop their independence.
One of the ways that you can do this is by providing advice on the right care home or nursing facility. You might assume that all care facilities are equal. However, this is not the case. Diligent nursing home abuse lawyers will tell you that there have been numerous cases where elderly residents have been treated poorly in nursing homes and care facilities. Of course, a safe and friendly environment is really the bare minimum you should consider when you are choosing the right care facility for your elderly parent.
You need to make sure that you choose an environment that is going to help bring improvements to their quality of life. There are many retirement communities that are based around this idea providing benefits for elderly parents, supporting their physical and their mental wellbeing.
Other Considerations
As a daughter, you should also ensure that you are thinking about other considerations that may be relevant. For instance, research shows that socialization becomes increasingly important as you get older. You can help ensure that your elderly parents do continue to socialise quite simply by visiting them as often as you should. Of course, this can just be the beginning. You might also want to think about encouraging them to take a more active role as a grandparent to your children. Providing them with the chance to independently care for your child or children will provide their later years with a sense of purpose and ensure that they feel more connected to your family.
Managing Priorities
As a new mother your main priority is always going to be your child. There’s nothing wrong with this and your parent will likely agree that the child should always come first. This means that if your parent does need additional support, you might need to hire a professional instead of trying to complete all of the work yourself.
It’s clear that it can be difficult managing your time as a parent and as a daughter. Particularly when you consider that you will also be handling both personal and professional commitments at the same time. This can lead you towards more stressful decisions such as moving your elderly parents into your home to live with you and your family. While this isn’t always going to be the worst decision, it’s something that you shouldn’t take lightly. You need to think about all the changes that this is going to bring to your life and what it could mean for you in the long term.
*This is a collaborative post.
A Really excellent and informative post, you certainly are right. Those kind of life decisions are difficult to make hence the need to think them through carefully and with informed good advice. Well done. x